Dear Frasier, you suck

I was reading a March issue of New York Magazine when I stumbled upon an article about Kelsey Grammer in which he says of Sarah Palin, "I don't like that so many women are willing to beat up on an attractive woman." There's no way to respond to a comment like that: it sends you straight back to seventh grade, when you realized that boys only cared about what hot girls thought. You can say, "I don't hate her because she's attractive, I hate her because she's an idiot," but if you aren't hot, Kelsey Grammer is not listening. (And even if you are hot, chances are, he's not listening.) You can do the knee-jerk thing and shout, "She's not that hot!" but that would only prove his point, which is that you hate Sarah Palin because you are ugly and she is beautiful. Saying that it troubles him to see women speaking out against a pretty woman is a great debate strategy.

But I think that despite his assholery, Kelsey Grammer has hit upon an important point: women are jealous of Sarah Palin. He thinks it's about looks, because what else would women care about? If he observed the day-to-day lives of the women who criticize Palin, he might find another reason for them to envy her.

Here's how a typical day in the life of a working mother of multiple children goes:

She wakes up and groggily gets out of bed to prepare breakfast, a good portion of which gets thrown on the floor. The kids whine: "You're giving me cereal again?" "Why isn't my shirt clean?" "I don't wanna go to school." She may or may not have someone helping her; if she is anything like my mother, her husband is busy watching the morning news.

She heads to work, where her boss, like all bosses, is a total dick. She is passed over for promotions and raises because her superiors say, Oh, all she cares about is her kids, she can't really commit to this job.

She comes home exhausted. Her kids whine: "I hate this dinner." "Why aren't you paying any attention to me?" If she is anything like my mother, her husband is busy watching the evening news; if he hears the children whining, he asks her, "Why are the children making so much noise?"

She goes to bed, having spent no time on herself all day. Her kids, her bosses, and her husband have barely noticed any of the work she has done for them.

Here's a typical day in the life of Sarah Palin:

She holds her baby for a magazine cover. She is fawned over because she didn't get an abortion. She is held up as an example of a great mom, despite her children's very public fuckups.

She is complimented as a modern working woman despite having quit her one actual job as governor.

People throw money at her for doing absolutely nothing, because listening to her speak is simply so dazzling.

I'm not saying Sarah Palin doesn't work hard as a mother. I have no idea what kind of parent she is. What I'm saying is that zillions of women are hardworking mothers and nobody pats them on the back, not their kids, not their bosses, not their partners, and definitely not any major news outlets, which are still wary of mothers in the workplace. These women don't have the option of quitting their jobs just because "only dead fish go with the flow." While Sarah Palin quits her job and gets attention and praise for everything she does and says, no matter how idiotic, most other women are *actually* doing their jobs and being ignored. So, if women are jealous of Sarah Palin, trust me, Kelsey, it's not about her looks.

While I'm writing posts directly to Kelsey Grammer, let me also say this: The show "Hank" failed because you are not believable as the father of anyone under thirty. It really skeeved me out to see you pretending otherwise, which is why I did not watch your show.